Asking for gifts is tacky, isn’t it?

Aside

You might think a gift registry is old school. Maybe you think it’s tacky. You don’t want to seem greedy “asking” for gifts.

Well guess what?!

People are going to buy you a gift for your wedding anyway. It may as well be something you would like and can use.

With that being said, you don’t have to go overboard. A gift registry can be as simple or as crazy as you want.

I was married at 27 and had been living on my own for a while. My husband was in the same boat (29) We had many of the common household items already. We used our Target gift registry as a way to upgrade and update some of the items we already were using. Once we received gift items, we were able to “donate” our starter items to younger siblings.

Maybe this is your circumstance, maybe not.

If you are new and just starting out, think of the little things. You and your future spouse might need a lot as you get settle into married life. Register for items such as towels, measuring cups and even serving spoons. All these things add up and when you are just getting started.

A traditional gift registry might not be your thing, that is okay. Contact your local travel agent and have them set up a “honeymoon registry” for you. This way, you can go on your dream honeymoon or do extra excursions while there if you already have one planned.

Tech savvy? Amazon has a gift registry as well. You don’t even need to leave your home- and neither do your guests. This is very convenient for those who might be traveling from afar (or celebrating from afar). Nothing beats 2 day prime shipping.

If you truly don’t need or want anything for your wedding, there are registry options for you too. Ask guests to donate to your favorite (or their favorite) charity in lieu of wedding gifts. There is a worthy cause out there that could use your support, trust me.

Now that we have established why you should register and gone over some options- consider these etiquette suggestions.

  • DO NOT – I repeat do not put your registry information on your wedding invites. This is tacky. Your registry information goes two places. (1) your wedding website (2) your shower invites. People will find out your registry information.
  • Register for different items at different price points. You want your guests to have options that fit the budget. Registering for only high end items is not the way to go.
  • Check on your registry often. If the selection for people to pick from is dwindling- add more items. This is really important in the two weeks leading up to a shower or your wedding day.
  • After every shower, after every party and after every gift is opened- Send a “Thank You”. A handwritten message is the way to go. There is nothing sweeter than a personalized “Thank You” expressing gratitude for a gift received. You might not dig the squirrel feeder your cousin gave you- but they thought it was neat. They thought you would like it. That is what matters.

Even though a gift registry might seem like a thing of the past, it’s not. There is a reason why they exist and most importantly- why you should have one.

You get married one time, embrace the motions. Just get registered.

 

 

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When are you having a baby?

“So, when are you having a baby?”

How many times have you been asked this question?

If you are planning a wedding, recently married or engaged-the chances are pretty likely.

Eager friends and family members just can’t wait!

Maybe you have plans to start (or expand) your family right after the ceremony. Then again, maybe you just don’t know.  Below are our favorite answers to the popular question.

  • We already have one and she/he is perfect! (This works with a fur baby just the same)
  • Although it’s been fun trying, we aren’t really sure just yet.
  • What a great question… I wish we knew the answer!
  • At least 9 months from now.
  • Well I just married one, not sure if I want more yet.
  • As soon as we get through our student loans, we don’t want to pay for tuition and diapers at the same time.
  • We aren’t sure, what about you?
  • We might start trying in _____  years/months
  • For now, we are just going to enjoy being married. No one knows what the future holds.

Asking for gifts is tacky, isn’t it?

Aside

You might think a gift registry is old school. Maybe you think it’s tacky. You don’t want to seem greedy “asking” for gifts.

Well guess what?!

People are going to buy you a gift for your wedding anyway. It may as well be something you would like and can use.

With that being said, you don’t have to go overboard. A gift registry can be as simple or as crazy as you want.

I was married at 27 and had been living on my own for a while. My husband was in the same boat (29) We had many of the common household items already. We used our Target gift registry as a way to upgrade and update some of the items we already were using. Once we received gift items, we were able to “donate” our starter items to younger siblings.

Maybe this is your circumstance, maybe not.

If you are new and just starting out, think of the little things. You and your future spouse might need a lot as you get settle into married life. Register for items such as towels, measuring cups and even serving spoons. All these things add up and when you are just getting started.

A traditional gift registry might not be your thing, that is okay. Contact your local travel agent and have them set up a “honeymoon registry” for you. This way, you can go on your dream honeymoon or do extra excursions while there if you already have one planned.

Tech savvy? Amazon has a gift registry as well. You don’t even need to leave your home- and neither do your guests. This is very convenient for those who might be traveling from afar (or celebrating from afar). Nothing beats 2 day prime shipping.

If you truly don’t need or want anything for your wedding, there are registry options for you too. Ask guests to donate to your favorite (or their favorite) charity in lieu of wedding gifts. There is a worthy cause out there that could use your support, trust me.

Now that we have established why you should register and gone over some options- consider these etiquette suggestions.

  • DO NOT – I repeat do not put your registry information on your wedding invites. This is tacky. Your registry information goes two places. (1) your wedding website (2) your shower invites. People will find out your registry information.
  • Register for different items at different price points. You want your guests to have options that fit the budget. Registering for only high end items is not the way to go.
  • Check on your registry often. If the selection for people to pick from is dwindling- add more items. This is really important in the two weeks leading up to a shower or your wedding day.
  • After every shower, after every party and after every gift is opened- Send a “Thank You”. A handwritten message is the way to go. There is nothing sweeter than a personalized “Thank You” expressing gratitude for a gift received. You might not dig the squirrel feeder your cousin gave you- but they thought it was neat. They thought you would like it. That is what matters.

Even though a gift registry might seem like a thing of the past, it’s not. There is a reason why they exist and most importantly- why you should have one.

You get married one time, embrace the motions. Go to the store or grab your laptop – and get registered. 

 

 

Buying Suits is better… or is it?

Rather than renting menswear for your wedding, your considering just purchasing suits. It’s cheaper and everyone can use a suit… right? Not necessarily.

This popular thinking is very popular among couples right now. For some weddings, this is a great choice. For most though, rentals are a better idea. You are given a better product at a lesser price.

Weighing out the pros and cons of purchasing versus renting is so important before making your decision.

Myth: Suits are cheaper.

Reality: Suits are the purchase of a jacket and pant (sometimes a vest).  Yes,  those two pieces might carry a minimal cost. Ask yourself this..

Are the gentleman in your party going sans shirts, shoes and accessory?

We hope not! Along with the purchase of a suit comes the rental or purchase of a shirt, vest and tie, shoe, cuff-links  and pocket square. Shoes also need to be considered. Not everyone will have an acceptable pair of shoes at hand. Purchasing or even just renting these items will add up quickly.

Also, suits require alterations to obtain ideal fit. Not only does this add to the budget. It requires time and an appointment.

Myth: Everyone can use a suit.

Reality: Not everyone can actually use a suit. Today, most professional jobs only require “business casual”. Most people do not wear suits to work. As far as other social events go, the average person only attends a formal event every 2 years. Most formal events are also “business casual”…

If you are thinking they can wear it in another wedding, think again. Each designer has a unique fabric, fit and lapel style. Even thought you have impeccable taste..the selection for your big day will likely not be the same as someone else. 

Myth: Rentals are so expensive

Reality: Most full service stores offer a free groom and discounts of up to $50 off each additional rental. The savings, especially during bridal shows and peak booking season can be amazing. You can easily gain leverage with a large wedding party.

Myth: Buying gets you a better product.

Reality: Renting gets you a better product. A typical rental coat and pant would retail for $500-$800. They are made from fine fabrics, high thread count wool (meaning a soft feel) and have a designer name brand behind them. The typical suit is purchased for around $100. The suit is $100 suit. They are polyester, imported from China and have no designer or brand name to stand behind them. It’s nice for day use or for a guest to wear to your wedding. Next to your bridal gown, your perfect dress- it might look a little cheap.

Myth: At least we can try a suit on…

Reality: Your full service store will offer a complete try on for you before you make your final decision. If you are on the fence about accessory items or unsure of fit. You can try it on.

 

 

Even though it’s popular right now, and might seem like a good idea- consider your options before making your final decision to purchase suits. It’s your wedding day- your wedding photographs. The average bridal gown costs $1589 .. what would it look best next to?

Rentals get a bad rep sometimes. Today, styles are different than they were when you went to prom. Found something on Pinterest? Rent it. It will complete the other half to your perfect wedding look.

 

 

Miss B.Perfect-Affair: Is it too soon?

Miss. B. Perfect-Affair is our resident wedding expert. Each month, she answers all your etiquette questions. Planning a wedding would be impossible without ruffling a few feathers. Have a question for her? Comment to the post below and she will surely answer. 

Affairs by Brittany

Dear Miss. B. Perfect-Affair,

I am engaged and planning a June 18th wedding next Summer. I know there is a suggested time frame of 6 months for ordering dresses and such…. With that being said, I feel like that is much too close to the wedding. I’m a planner. I already have started shopping and how found some dresses I want. Is it too soon to order? 

Is-it-too-soon

Dear Is-it-too-soon,

It is never too soon to order. Most bridal fashion is timeless and styles don’t vary too much from one season to the next. In fact, the sooner you can cross dresses off your long list, the better. Your bridal attire is one of the first items you should shop for. The styling of your gowns really help shape the look of the entire day. So, the answer is simple; no. Order away.

Best wishes and good luck,

Miss. B. Perfect-Affair

Bridesmaids

Dear Miss. B. Perfect-Affair,

My fiance refuses to wear a jacket at our wedding. I understand he wants to keep a relaxed look and is all concerned about cost. My wedding is in a church and I have an understated, but stunning ballgown. I don’t feel his casual attire matches my wedding day vision.

Sincerely,

might-as-well-wear-jeans

Might-as-well-wear-jeans,

You poor girl. He has some good reasons for wanting to nix the coat on his attire, however, he may be a little misinformed. First of all, the menswear in your wedding should compliment the ladies. In a church setting with a gorgeous ballgown, a jacket should be worn- at least for the ceremony. Most churches have air conditioning and most modern ceremonies take less than 30 minutes.

As for cost, most of the time the groom is given his rental for free. Also, just removing the jacket from the rental package usually doesn’t remove much of the cost. Many times, the discounts and special sales for rentals are only valid on full suits or tuxedos.

I would advise you to chat with him about all the options and see your local bridal or formal wear store.

Good luck with everything,

Miss.B. Perfect-Affair

Miss. B. Perfect-Affairs: Help!? I found the one but Mom doesn’t approve…

Miss. B. Perfect-Affairs answers all your wedding etiquette questions. Each week features a new question and answer. Have an etiquette question of your own? Leave a comment and your question will be answered.

Miss. B. Perfect-Affairs,

Not sure what to do here… I have found “the one”. A beautiful slim fitting gown with a halter neckline and short train. This gown is perfect for my beach wedding this summer. One problem… My mother does not approve. She thinks I should have the typical “princess ballgown” style . My fiance and I are paying for the wedding and this gown also fits our tight budget. How can I get my dream dress and my mothers approval?

Sincerely,

Seeking-mothers-approval

Dear Seeking-mothers-approval,

Your situation is not an easy one. Invite your mother to lunch or set up a time to visit with her. Make sure she understands your concern for her feelings about your gown. Explain to her that although a ballgown may be perfect for some brides, for you- this gown is perfect. It fits your wedding day vision, your style, and your budget. Communicate in a positive way to her that you truly want her approval on your wedding day style. After all, it’s your big day and you want to feel incredible.

Sincerely,

Miss. B. Perfect-Affairs

Miss. B. Perfect-Affairs: Help!? I found the one but Mom doesn’t approve…

Miss. B. Perfect-Affairs answers all your wedding etiquette questions. Each week features a new question and answer. Have an etiquette question of your own? Leave a comment and your question will be answered.

Miss. B. Perfect-Affairs,

Not sure what to do here… I have found “the one”. A beautiful slim fitting gown with a halter neckline and short train. This gown is perfect for my beach wedding this summer. One problem… My mother does not approve. She thinks I should have the typical “princess ballgown” style . My fiance and I are paying for the wedding and this gown also fits our tight budget. How can I get my dream dress and my mothers approval?

Sincerely,

Seeking-mothers-approval

Dear Seeking-mothers-approval,

Your situation is not an easy one. Invite your mother to lunch or set up a time to visit with her. Make sure she understands your concern for her feelings about your gown. Explain to her that although a ballgown may be perfect for some brides, for you- this gown is perfect. It fits your wedding day vision, your style, and your budget. Communicate in a positive way to her that you truly want her approval on your wedding day style. After all, it’s your big day and you want to feel incredible.

Sincerely,

Miss. B. Perfect-Affairs

 

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