Modern Wedding Etiquette: Help with Sticky Situations

With planning comes certain etiquette standards that must be upheld. Yes, we live in modern times. No, this doesn’t give you (or your guests) a free pass to be rude. We have answers to some  sticky etiquette questions that you (or someone you know) might encounter this season.

Do I really need to mail “Save the Date” cards? 

No, not usually. Save the Date cards are appropriate and intended for those couples who might be planning around a holiday weekend, have very busy friends and family, or who are planning an extended engagement. Think of them as a pre-invitation. They are sent out with the simple purpose of letting someone know they will be receiving an invitation to your big day.

Do I really need to buy shower gifts for every shower? How about the bachelorette party?

If you are invited to the party, bring a gift- especially if you are in the wedding. With that being said, it doesn’t need to be elaborate or super expensive each time. Maybe the couple registered for drinking glasses- bring one set to each affair. Does that bride (or groom) bake? Buy different baking dishes so at the end of the showers, they have a full set. There are so many creative ways to be polite.

Who gets invited to the rehearsal supper? 

The entire wedding party, their dates or spouses and children. Also, the officiant and your parents. Don’t forget to extend the invite to out-of-town guests who have taken time from work and traveled to celebrate with you.

Do I need a gift opening?

The gift opening is a tradition that does not need to be maintained. Although it is fun for some to see what the new couple has received for gifts- for most, they would rather sleep in or hit the road home. Many couples now do this in the privacy of their own home. If you do host one, plan to feed the people who come.

Do kids have to be invited? 

This is a sticky situation. Think about the people you are inviting. Do many of your friends have small children? Does your family have a lot of little ones?

Do you want them to come?

If your crowd is mostly adults or are big party people, you might be safe keeping it adults only. If your group has kids, you might be offending the people you are closest to. Do what you want to, but expect some just won’t come.

 

 

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